Finding Your Marbles
A Mental Health Survival Guide

I’m frustrated by the way that our society handles suicide. On one hand, people who commit suicide, or who even think of suicide, are condemned as evil, selfish cowards, and on the other hand, we know and accept that suicide and suicidal thoughts are common symptoms of many mental illnesses.

This creates a conflict for anyone who suffers from a condition like depression, and who is troubled by suicidal thoughts. Suicidal thoughts are a big warning sign that there is something wrong, yet even though we know that these thoughts have a medical cause, there is such a culture of shame and fear around suicide that most sufferers would rather keep silent and refuse treatment rather than ask for help.

Suicide is an act of desperation. People who commit suicide do so because they have given up on the hope that they will ever feel better. And by clinging to outdated myths and unfair notions about suicide, we as a society are failing to help these people. Each person who commits suicide is a loss for us all.

Continue reading “Four Dangerous Myths About Suicide and How to Avoid Them” »

Therapy is expensive. Really expensive. I used to joke with my therapist that for the amount of money that I spent on therapy I could have gone on a cruise, or at least had a great weekend in Vegas.

One thing to keep in mind when you are trying to figure out how to pay for therapy is that therapy is very important. Your mental health should be one of your top priorities. Therefore, when you are trying to balance your budget, or when you are looking for a way to pay for your therapy, try to keep things in perspective. Think of any money that you spend on therapy not as an expense, but as a necessary and positive investment in your future well-being and good mental health.

Continue reading “What to do When You Can’t Afford Therapy” »

Medication can be very expensive, especially medication for mental illness. Lots of expensive research goes into those drugs, and the drug companies charge very high prices to recover their costs.

Since costs can run upwards of $75/month for some medications, this can be a major problem if you are out of money or if you’ve got to take a lot of different medications together. Even worse is when you run out of money in the middle of a medication cycle and you might start missing doses. With some medication, such as SSRIs, missing doses can be very serious so there are some major health implications if you can’t afford meds.

There are a couple of things that you can do to get your medication if you can’t afford to pay for it. Some of them take a bit of work and patience, so it is a good idea to plan ahead and make sure that you always have a good supply. The last thing you want is to be on your last pill when an unexpected bill comes in.

Continue reading “What to do When You Can’t Afford Medication” »

This article is dedicated to my friend J. We were talking about self-injury the other day and I said something very stupid about people who self-injure. It was unfair and I apologize.

Self-injury is one of those “misunderstood” aspects of mental health. There are all kinds of myths and misconceptions about people who self-injure, from “they are just seeking attention” to “they are just too cowardly to commit suicide.” The sad truth is that self-injury is neither a cry for attention, nor is it “practice” for suicide. It is an unfortunate side effect of many mental illnesses, most notably depression.

When you feel the urge to self-injure, there are a few things that you can do to help make the feelings go away and keep from hurting yourself. In this article I will talk about a couple of them.

Continue reading “What to do When You Want to Self-Injure” »

For me, one of the worst aspects of depression was how much it affected my ability to make decisions. I’m a “take charge” kind of guy, and I felt absolutely helpless when I was so paralyzed by my depression that I couldn’t even make simple decisions. And tough decisions? Forget it!

Last summer I was reading “What Color is Your Parachute” by Richard Bolles, and I found a great decision making tool. With a bit of tinkering, I have come up with my own version of the tool, and now I use it all the time to help me make tough decisions. I wish I had it 5 years ago when I was still depressed.

Continue reading “How To Make Tough Decisions When You Are Depressed” »

I am one of those lucky people who suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder, also known as “SAD.” It starts every December; my energy levels drop, my moods change, and I start to have trouble sleeping. Fortunately, I have a couple of ways that I deal with SAD so that it has a minimal impact on my life.

According to the Mood Disorders Society of Canada, nobody really knows what causes SAD. It is thought that the condition is brought on by the body’s response to shorter days and colder temperatures in winter. In general, sufferers report lower energy levels, depressed mood, and, strangely, a huge craving for carbohydrates. (it is this craving that differentiates SAD from depression)

There are lots of treatments available for SAD, such as light boxes, medication and therapy, and they are all worth a try. However, most of the treatments focus on the symptoms and not the underlying condition. To effectively manage SAD, you need make some changes to your lifestyle and habits such as managing your sleeping patterns and habits.

Continue reading “How to Live with Seasonal Affective Disorder” »

I used to be terrible at crisis management. When anything bad happened that was outside my control, I would always come apart at the seams. I would start to panic, and I would end up making a huge mess of things and getting myself more depressed and anxious.

At an old job I had, one of my projects was to write up a crisis management plan. When I was finished this project, I began to wonder if I could apply the same skills and techniques that I used at work to my personal life to see if I could do a better job at crisis management. After some experiments and fine tuning, I developed a five-part personal crisis management system. By applying this system, I was eventually able to manage my anxiety during a crisis. I wasn’t as unprepared when things went wrong, and I was able to quickly calm myself down and get the crisis under control.

Continue reading “How To Manage a Crisis” »

In Part 4 of the Therapy Series: Leaving Your Therapist, I discussed how therapy relationships end, and how to end a relationship positively. In this final section I will share some of my thoughts on therapy and I will talk a bit about “alternative” therapies that I have encountered.

As I mentioned in the Introduction, therapy saved my life. If I hadn’t gone to therapy, my depression would have spiralled out of control and I don’t know where I would have ended up. Therapy is the single best tool for treating mental illness and I can’t recommend it enough. It is one of the necessary steps to full recovery.

Continue reading “Therapy Series Part 5: Thoughts on Therapy” »

In Part 3 of this series: “What To Do After Each Session,” I talked about what you should do after each therapy session. In this section, I will discuss how therapy relationships end, how to tell when your therapy relationship is coming to a positive end, what to do when your therapy relationship breaks down, and how to manage your “after therapy” relationship with your therapist.

Therapy relationships are not permanent, and eventually, your therapy will come to an end. You will either end the relationship yourself, or your therapist will end it, or you will come to a mutual agreement that you no longer need to continue in therapy. Leaving therapy can be a frightening and emotional experience. However, in a healthy therapy relationship, leaving therapy can be a form of rebirth. If you had a positive experience with your therapy, it will form a strong foundation on which you can build a healthy and happy life.

Continue reading “Therapy Series Part 4: Leaving Your Therapist” »

In Part 2 of this series: “Your First Therapy Appointment,” I talked about how to prepare for your first therapy session, and what to expect from therapy and your therapist. In this article, I will discuss what you can do after each therapy session to make your therapy more effective, and to help you survive the most difficult parts.

One day I was talking to a friend of mine who was going through some particularly difficult therapy sessions for anxiety. We were talking about how we both felt after our sessions were over. My friend described the “after-therapy” feeling to a T. He said, “It’s the feeling that you get after you have been to the gym or after you just spent all day working hard. You are exhausted, sore, and at the end of your strength, but there is a little voice inside you saying “Hooray, I did it!”"

Continue reading “Therapy Series Part 3: What to do After Each Therapy Session” »