Finding Your Marbles
A Mental Health Survival Guide

I used to be terrible at crisis management. When anything bad happened that was outside my control, I would always come apart at the seams. I would start to panic, and I would end up making a huge mess of things and getting myself more depressed and anxious.

At an old job I had, one of my projects was to write up a crisis management plan. When I was finished this project, I began to wonder if I could apply the same skills and techniques that I used at work to my personal life to see if I could do a better job at crisis management. After some experiments and fine tuning, I developed a five-part personal crisis management system. By applying this system, I was eventually able to manage my anxiety during a crisis. I wasn’t as unprepared when things went wrong, and I was able to quickly calm myself down and get the crisis under control.

Continue reading “How To Manage a Crisis” »

In Part 4 of the Therapy Series: Leaving Your Therapist, I discussed how therapy relationships end, and how to end a relationship positively. In this final section I will share some of my thoughts on therapy and I will talk a bit about “alternative” therapies that I have encountered.

As I mentioned in the Introduction, therapy saved my life. If I hadn’t gone to therapy, my depression would have spiralled out of control and I don’t know where I would have ended up. Therapy is the single best tool for treating mental illness and I can’t recommend it enough. It is one of the necessary steps to full recovery.

Continue reading “Therapy Series Part 5: Thoughts on Therapy” »

In Part 3 of this series: “What To Do After Each Session,” I talked about what you should do after each therapy session. In this section, I will discuss how therapy relationships end, how to tell when your therapy relationship is coming to a positive end, what to do when your therapy relationship breaks down, and how to manage your “after therapy” relationship with your therapist.

Therapy relationships are not permanent, and eventually, your therapy will come to an end. You will either end the relationship yourself, or your therapist will end it, or you will come to a mutual agreement that you no longer need to continue in therapy. Leaving therapy can be a frightening and emotional experience. However, in a healthy therapy relationship, leaving therapy can be a form of rebirth. If you had a positive experience with your therapy, it will form a strong foundation on which you can build a healthy and happy life.

Continue reading “Therapy Series Part 4: Leaving Your Therapist” »

In Part 2 of this series: “Your First Therapy Appointment,” I talked about how to prepare for your first therapy session, and what to expect from therapy and your therapist. In this article, I will discuss what you can do after each therapy session to make your therapy more effective, and to help you survive the most difficult parts.

One day I was talking to a friend of mine who was going through some particularly difficult therapy sessions for anxiety. We were talking about how we both felt after our sessions were over. My friend described the “after-therapy” feeling to a T. He said, “It’s the feeling that you get after you have been to the gym or after you just spent all day working hard. You are exhausted, sore, and at the end of your strength, but there is a little voice inside you saying “Hooray, I did it!”"

Continue reading “Therapy Series Part 3: What to do After Each Therapy Session” »

In Article 1 of this series, Choosing a Therapist, we talked about how to find and choose a therapist. In this segment, I will talk about making your first therapy appointment, how to prepare, and what to expect when you get there. Finally, I will talk about the evolution and growth of the relationship between you and your therapist.

Continue reading “Therapy Series Part 2: Your First Therapy Appointment” »

Choosing a therapist is a lot like dating. You want to find someone who is supportive, someone who understands you, someone who is compassionate and who cares about your interests, and, above all, someone who you can trust. Also, just like dating, choosing a bad therapist can be a total nightmare, and one bad experience can be so discouraging that you are tempted to just give up. Finally, to make things worse, there are hundreds of therapists and there’s no easy way to pick the right one.

So what’s a person to do?

The answer is simple. Do some research, ask lots of questions, and be patient.

Continue reading “Therapy Series Part 1: Choosing a Therapist” »

Therapy. It’s a loaded word. To someone who suffers from mental illness, no one word sums up all the fears and hopes of sufferers like the word “therapy.” In one word is contained all our fears of exposure and ridicule (”if I go to therapy then everyone will know that I’m crazy!”) alongside our deepest-held and most cherished hopes for recovery and a normal life.

If you suffer from a mental illness, at some point in your life you will end up in some sort of therapy, whether it is a few “stress-buster” sessions with a relaxation coach, or full-blown institutionalization at a mental hospital. For most of us, going to therapy for the first time was, or will be, the most difficult and terrifying thing that we have ever attempted. Beginning therapy is the first step to recovery, and if you suffer from mental illness, it will be when you finally decide to face your illness. This week, I will be writing a series of articles that will attempt to help you begin, and get through, therapy. Therapy saved my life, and I hope I can help it save yours.

Continue reading “Therapy Series: Introduction” »

Here’s a neat little trick I learned back when I was doing Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for depression. CBT is a type of therapy that works on “inappropriate thinking,” I.E., it is based on the theory that mood disorders can be caused by, or at least worsened by, inappropriate emotional responses to events. Or, in other words, when you are depressed, you are getting upset when you probably shouldn’t be. It’s pretty cool and it’s easy to learn, but it takes a bit of practice.

Continue reading “Ten Minute Therapy” »

I was talking to a depressed friend of mine a couple of years ago. She was almost entirely crippled by her depression and she could barely cope at work. I asked her why she wouldn’t tell her boss about her depression. Her reply,

“I can’t talk about it. Nobody talks about it. You just don’t bring it up here.”

Continue reading ““Nobody Talks about it”” »

In Part 1 of this article, I talked about using the Square Breathing technique to manage a panic attack. In this article, I will talk about a second technique, Grounding.

What is Grounding?

I learned how to use grounding (also sometimes called “situational awareness”) back when I was suffering from PTSD and I was getting flashbacks. By using grounding techniques, I was able to control my flashbacks and get myself calmed down. Later on, I also found that grounding worked for panic attacks. It’s a good skill to have.

The idea behind grounding is that it helps you manage your panic attacks or flashbacks by teaching you to concentrate on the “real” world around you, instead of the false fears and images that your brain is creating. It takes some practice, but it is a very useful trick to know, especially when a flashback or panic attack catches you off guard. (which, for me, was “always”)

Continue reading “How To Survive a Panic Attack Part 2” »